Chapter One: Part B - The Cow that Kicked

The truth will set you free, but first it will really piss you off

I know that I mentioned previously that I am half scientist and half artist. Throughout my writings, you are going to get to know me.

I need to warn you of something important now.

I don’t make sense

I don’t fit nicely into any compartment

I am a G on the world-famous DISC profile.

There is no recipe or formula behind me.

I am mysterious.

More like a G-spot.

Forgive me, that was a joke too far, and I just lost my evangelical readers.

Forgive me. Stay with me. These writings, although irreverent, are holy.

I can feel it as I write. Typing furiously with my thumbs still as I walk the treadmill under my standing desk, the words are flowing out of me.

These writings are holy because your human life is sacred, and the 3-word goal system I have created here is going to unlock the life you were designed to live.

Let’s talk about rejecting your current reality (after first accepting it)

Disillusionment. Disappointment. Dissatisfaction.

These 3 D’s can be powerful drivers for change.

As I sat on that rock, I had to accept that my life was a failed experiment.

I was fat

I was unfit

I was not happy

I was failing in my role as a father

We’ve got so precious in hearing the negative.

When a friend tells us that they’ve fucked up, failed, or done something wrong.

The first thing we want to do is minimize

Ameliorate their pain.

Tell them they are still good.

Empathize, telling them we did something similar 15 years ago.

And yet pain is an incredible driver for change.

Maybe you are not being a true friend when you say these things?

Perhaps you're trying to avoid feeling the same thing?

Maybe a real friend says…

“Yeah, bro, you fattest and most unfit, I’ve ever seen you.”

Or

“ Yeah, you are setting a terrible example for your kids. At this rate, they won’t even have a dad in 10 years.”

Or

“I get it. You could be doing so much better.”

The trouble is, you are probably reading these words coldly, and they probably sound mean.

And yet, every line here could be said to a friend with love and with tears in your eyes.

My acting teacher used to say…

“The truth will set you free, but first it will really piss you off.”

If you have a piece of paper or a journal with you right now, I’d love you to jot down 5-10 things that you really don’t like about your life at the moment.

As I sat on that rock 18 months ago, mine were:

• Physically very unfit

• Unable to play with kids

• Not practicing what I teach

• Involved in a toxic relationship

• Inconsistent revenue streams

• Way too passive in my life

I don’t feel particularly good about any of these things, even now.

And yet if I wish to grow, I have to accept their truth.

I don’t know where you are.

I am not sure what is disappointing to your soul.

But it is always there, and I am glad that you feel that way.

However fucked up and dark your life is, I welcome that truth. I celebrate that you are not pretending or minimizing the seriousness of your situation.

You deserve better.

There is so much more for you.

Once we accept our current reality, we can finally reject it and, for the first time in a long time… proudly say.. this is not my future.

In my very first job, I was a Veterinary Surgeon in rural New Zealand.

As part of that work, I would perform pregnancy tests on cows.

For the ignorant among you (you are blessed), this involved sticking my entire arm up the cow’s anus and feeling to see if there was a calf or any signs of pregnancy in the uterus below.

It was a shitty job (no pun) and on some days I would test over 500 cows.

They were wild, back of the world, barely seen a human, cattle beasts also.

They would kick (rightfully), stomp, and crush you against the cattle gate.

It was exhausting, and I did not like it, and yet I persisted.

Until one day, a small wild cow pirouetted on her front legs and booted me with both hind feet right in the nuts.

It was my” yeah, fuck no” moment. I applied for a new job working with pussycats in the city and never went back to the land.

That is the transforming pier of the truth.

You get to imagine a new future.

That’s also the power of our 3-word goals.

For the paid supporters of this blog, I will now tell you about my very first 3-word goal and help you set yours.